imfdb.org

imfdb.org (http://forum.imfdb.org/index.php)
-   Off Topic (http://forum.imfdb.org/forumdisplay.php?f=3)
-   -   Bond vs Bourne vs Bauer (http://forum.imfdb.org/showthread.php?t=1243)

Mandolin1 09-03-2010 03:01 AM

Bond vs Bourne vs Bauer
 
Who do you think would win if they fought each other? You'd have to rule out gadget (Bond wins by killing the other 2 with a hail of fire from his remote-control, bullet-proof flying car, then finishes them off with his wrist dart gun) or supporting organizations (Bourne hasn't got one and the other can use satellites to "cheat"). Disclaimer: I've seen all 3 Bourne movies, the first 7 hours of Season 1 of 24, and no James Bond films.
Personally, I think Bond and Bauer have been around too long. Bond, who's still around only due to stupid villains and bad guys who can't shoot straight, should at least (after 22 Bond girls) have an STD that forces him to retire and Bauer should either be in prison for ignoring the law to bring down various criminals or retired after season 5. How does a guy spend 18 months getting tortured in a Chinese prison and get his job back? The Chinese should know EVERYTHING about CTU and he should be a total wreck.
As for their weapon, Bond is a a disadvantage, since he has a little 32. PPK, rather than the 9mm weapons that Jason and Lack prefer. Also, Bond has wildly stupid villains (irradiate the gold in Fort Knox to drive up the price of gold worldwide? Wipe out all mankind from space? and other dumb plots) and is dumb himself. Spies/assassins don't walk into a bar, have drink with their target, and announce that they're the guy who took out 15 other maniacal billionaires. Bauer? Let's see: in the beginning of season 1, his boss is ambushed in a building and calls Jack. Rather than get a half-dozen co-workers to help him, he goes alone, with just a pistol. Uh, I thought the No. 2 rule of gunfights, right after "bring a gun", is "bring a bigger gun than the other guy" So he goes, boss gets killed, and Jack take the incriminating card back with him...only to confide in the PERSON THE CARD SAID WAS THE BAD GUY!!! Anyway, Bourne improvises, never breaks a law if he can help it (Not often, I admit) and generally seems much smarter that the other two guys. Jason just seems like a more intelligent person and a better spy.

Sorry if this seems disjointed, confused, or biased, it's late. And please no other film characters either.

FirearmFan 09-03-2010 06:22 AM

I think both Bourne and Bauer are significantly more badass than Bond. Don't get me wrong I like all the Bond movies and the new Daniel Craig version of Bond is a bit more hardcore but I don't think he stands up to Bourne or Bauer.

Bourne is highly trained in multiple facets of kick-assery including short and long range weapons and hand to hand combat. I believe in the movies he used a modified form of Eskrima/Kali.

Bauer is also highly trained with years of military and law enforcement experience including Special Forces and S.W.A.T. prior to his years in Counter Terrorism if my memory serves me correctly.

The one advantage I see for Bauer over Bourne is that he is much more ruthless. If a puppy were to get in the way of Bauer and his enemy he would kill the puppy and use its body to beat his enemy to death, whereas I think Bourne might pet it and maybe try to help find its owner. Hand to hand without guns though I don't think Jack could take Jason.

Excalibur 09-03-2010 01:14 PM

You need to WATCH at least one Bond movie for your argument to count.

Spades of Columbia 09-03-2010 01:37 PM

Bond now uses a 9mm, the last two he had walther P99. Boure and bond could take bauer in hand to hand...with guns it would be whoever would have the drop...and you forgot one little detail...Ethan Hunt would kill them all!

Mandolin1 09-03-2010 01:43 PM

Thanks, I'm not interested. First, for the same reason I've never tried watching Star Trek: Too many movies. Trilogy, OK. 22 movies? I'll pass. Also, I'm not interested in a guy who thinks a .32 ACP is worth carrying when he knows he's going to have to shoot someone, can't accomplish anything without a magic gadget, and only fights stupid villains while having sex with beautiful woman with embarrassingly stupid names. I have read Dr. No (the book). Anyway, who do you think would win?

Mandolin1 09-03-2010 01:46 PM

I said, please no other movie characters. I don't want a 8-way fight because everyone adds their own favorite character. Start a new thread if you want, but leave this one to the three J.B.s

Spades of Columbia 09-03-2010 02:42 PM

If your not interested in a guy who thinks a .32 ACP is worth carrying then why are you asking about him. Whats the point of this if you just trash talk a character that you dont know much about. Your comparing modern day character to a guy that got his claim to fame in the 60's and 70's and you dont want to hear what bond has become in recent years with Craig. Real answer...based on what they can do...Bourne wins...Bauer is just a lost boy on the small screen...and Bond is damn near a God level with his unbeatable tactics in 22 movies and counting that he wouldn't even show up to the fight because there aint no ladies.

funkychinaman 09-03-2010 05:56 PM

- I think a lot of this depends on which Bond. Daniel Craig can probably kick some ass. Roger Moore, probably not as much.

- Bond's job isn't necessarily to go around killing people, hence the .32 ACP PPK. If he was, he'd probably change out of that tux and put down that martini glass too.

- That being said, I'd probably go with Bourne. He's the only one of these guys who is an assassin by trade. Jack Bauer, at the end of the day, is still a law enforcement officer, albeit one who tortures and kills a lot of people. And Bond can assassinate people, but that's just a small aspect of his job.

(I've seen all the Bond movies, all the Bourne movies (including the 1988 one) and Season 8 of 24.)

S&Wshooter 09-03-2010 07:17 PM

BOurne. Bob Lee Swagger (from the books, not the movie) or Jack Reacher would wipe them all out though

Spartan198 09-03-2010 11:35 PM

Bourne wins hands down.


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:51 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.0
Copyright ©2000 - 2022, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.