In the beginning, the universe was created . . . this made a lot of people angry and was widely considered a bad move.

I'M OUT OF PEANUT BUTTER!:eek::eek:

BWAHAHAHA! Just to be a dick, I'm going to go make myself a PB&J sammich

My god, those sandwiches were wonderful. I happened to have my favorite style of PB (the kind w/ honey mixed in) and my favorite jelly (strawberry), which made for a perfect PB&J. It had the perfect mix of filling and wasn't too messy.

Marshmallow Fluff: y/n ?

Hell no. That'd be too much

I’ve never eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

What. The. Fuck

I know...Peanut butter and jelly sandwich...

I've never seen The Godfather.

You need to see it. Goodfellas too

I've seen that already.

Have you seen Watchmen?

Yes, but that was released only one year ago and isn't considered one of the absolute greatest movies ever made. The Godfather is and I've had nearly 23 years to get around to viewing it.

I'm pretty sure I learned that fact from cracked, and based on the way he wrote that I think he did too. haha. I've probably learned more from cracked than school, except with cracked once in a while you got to watch out for the bs they can sometimes give you.

My cat likes to walk on the banister.

i made a mini noose out of OD parachute cord
then made a slightly larger noose with a shorter rope out of red shoestring

the result was me putting the larger noose the smaller so it looked like the noose was hanging itself. oh yeah..i attached it above my computer.

creativity FTW

My cat is larger than a bobcat and isn't even a year old. I throw him at people who incur my wrath

Here's what cats do when you're not home:

25%: Staring out your window

25%: Sleeping

50%: Putting on your clothes and reading your E-mail.

My cats are far too small to wear my clothes. Anyone notice that cats like to lay in boxes and bags?

Hey there, I'm Therese Stevens, from Boston, Massachusetts. A certified travel bug, I love traveling to different parts of the world, and of course being a lady, I'm in love with shopping and dining fancy dishes. I definitely enjoy experiencing new cultures and tasting delish gourmet dishes.

By the way, I'm a true blue website designer. See you around!

I notice. How many cats do you have?

3. We had two, then one died so we got another (the big ass bobcat creature) and then my cousin gave us a kitten (which is my cat). The sucky thing is that out of our two original cats, the awesome cat died at Christmas and the shitty Hate Cat is still kicking

What do you feed it?

SPAM!
Surgeons Warning!:
THIS STUFF BLOWS AND TASTES LIKE SHIT

I'm thankful she placed that link for stretch mark removing cream.

Cat food. Normal ass cat food

I don´t feed my cat, if he´s hungry, he´ll hunt a bird or stole the cat food from the kitchen.

Your cat can use a can opener?

We don´t buy him cans (they´re expensive). Just that dry food that comes in a bag, he loves it.

Is it Meow Mix?

I Like Chicken!

I Like Liver!

Meow Mix Meow Mix!

Please Deliver!

¡Quiero Pollo!
¡Quiero Hígado!
¡Maulle Combinación Maulle Combinación!
¡Entregue por favor!

Fixed.

Btw, here´s S&Wshooter´s cat:

http://www.dailyhaha.com/_pics/fat_happy_cat.jpg

I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, hysterical naked
dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn, looking for an angry fix;
Angel-headed hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection
to the starry dynamo in the machinery of the night.

No no no- my cat has almost no fat on him. He's like a cat version of a body builder